It’s Sunday, and true to your dating app profile, you want a long walk and a roast. But also true to your dating app profile, you don’t take yourself too seriously – and that’s why you’re rocking the Beavertown Essentials range, as you venture out for a plate of gravy-soaked heaven.
DID YOU BOOK?
Of course you didn’t book. Thinking ahead is what our parents did, getting turned down by two pubs, then marching your party straight out of the third because it doesn’t serve Neck Oil, is just your generation’s vibe. If the Universe wanted you to find a table, it would make it so.
And you know what? You’ll hike across the known universe if you have to, that’s why your shins are protruding out of a pair of Essential Skull Printed Shorts, keeping your nethers as breezy as your attitude to booking head.
IT’S ALL GRAVY.
Having hovered by a family for an hour, almost certainly ruining their roast, your perseverance pays off as they leave earlier than they planned and you finally nab a table that’s a mere 3 chairs short of the number you need.
It’s also covered in a constellation of gravy, giving you pause. Your afternoon cruise used up vital fuel and you know you won’t have the restraint required to ensure stable, safe passage for the gravy as it journeys from the plate to your mouth. You wonder, are my new Beavertown Essential range threads machine washable?
You bet your swede-mash stain they are!
STUFFED?
Potatoes are the star of the Roast dinner plate, in that their gravitational pull is undeniable, and aren’t they yellow!
You knew the risks, but you dived in anyway, hoovering up everyone else’s like a giant starch-ship and rendering yourself on the verge of a lightyears long cryo-sleep. Don’t fight it, lean in – you’re rocking the Essential Skulls Backprint Hoodie, so you know this nap’s gonna have a soft landing.
